Horoscopes

First: A funny little bit I found on the corner of national review, a political website:

Because It’s Friday

November 5, 2010 5:36 P.M.

By Daniel Foster    

Follow these simple steps for a cheap laugh:

Step 1.       Go to http://maps.google.com
Step 2.       Click get directions
Step 3.       Type origin (A) as Japan
Step 4.       Type Destination (B) as China
Step 5.       Go to line 43
Step 6.       Laugh!

 From the Onion, an online website:

http://www.theonion.com/

• Aries After taxes, overhead, and legal fees, that million-dollar idea you've been working on for years will wind up costing you about $3,500.
• Taurus You'll finally realize a dream you've had since childhood, dear Taurus, when a huge scary monster comes out from under your bed and eats you alive.
• Gemini The reason for your recent crises of conscience will become clear this week when you discover the angel from your right shoulder and the devil from your left have been sleeping together for about a year now.
• Cancer Next week won't be the best you've ever had, but it will advance medical understanding of genital implosion by leaps and bounds.
• Leo A good friend will be a pillar of strength and support during a harrowing crisis. Show your appreciation by sending this person a note that says, "Thanks for your support."
• Virgo You'll continue to get away with your horrendous crimes against humanity without suffering consequences, although they will eventually get you for the tax evasion.
• Libra You won't be absolutely certain you like the changes in yourself— especially considering you'll appeal to a whole new group of people—after they make a 12-inch dance remix of you.
• Scorpio The stars say there's nothing wrong with being a belt-and-suspenders type, but you should probably reconsider being a leather-shorts-and-no-shirt type as well.
• Sagittarius The FDA will realize its mistake too late to prevent your death when it accidentally names you as part of a complete breakfast.
• Capricorn You'll realize that you hallucinated that everyone was wearing business casual all weekend, which explains why Halloween was so awkward this year.
• Aquarius Romance will once again pass you by this week when the love of your life decides to go with a person who makes better mix-tapes.
• Pisces You will get a reasonably good deal on a necessary household item, which is frankly more than an asshole like you deserves.

Nothing Today

Nothing today, just writing my paper. : (

Counting Crows - Holiday in Spain

 Office Space: A Case of the Mondays

Great Driving Song

Stone Temple Pilots -Big Empty

Blues

I've compiled a somewhat lengthy list of songs I just can't listen to when I'm down. I'm in no way sad now, but I need a topic and I really don't listen to any specific songs when I'm happy - maybe more Pearl Jam and Red Hot Chili Peppers, but nothing specific. This post is also a steal of a post on another blog, but I got her permission - somewhat. Thanks again.

In alphabetic order:

Bush - 40 Miles From the Sun

Cracker - Gentleman's Blues

Frank Sinatra - Yesterday (much better than the Beatles version in my humble opinion)

Gym Class Heroes - Everyday's Forecast

Our Lady Peace - Somewhere Out There

Seether - Fine Again

Weezer - Island in the Sun

The Onion's Weekly Horoscopes

The Onion is an online newspaper. I don't know if they are in print or not but I usually check their site online about...umm, every day. Here is the link:

http://www.theonion.com/

• Aries An in-depth study will reveal that, contrary to popular belief, bedbugs are great and you are the problem.
• Taurus You'll once again get into a public shouting match at an upscale bistro this week over what is and is not in fact gangsta.
• Gemini Somehow it just seems unfair that several famous people will make hundreds of dollars after picking you in next week's Mundane Individual Dead Pool.
• Cancer Nothing of note will happen to you this week, as the dozens of people you'll tell about it will be able to attest.
• Leo Venus rising in your sign sounds like a welcome harbinger of romantic good tidings, but the zodiac assures you it's merely decorative.
• Virgo The largest meteorite ever to hit a person was about 45 pounds, making you a posthumous shoo-in for the record next Wednesday.
• Libra The universal redshift indicates that the stars are flying away from us at astounding velocities. Perhaps it is more accurate to say "from you."
• Scorpio The stars are tired of politely nodding when you say you're single because you're "too picky." You're 25 pounds overweight and, frankly, the body odor is getting out of hand.
• Sagittarius They say God never gives us more than we can handle, which must mean He knows a way you can handle a swarm of hyperaggressive Africanized bees.
• Capricorn Before making any important business decisions next week, ask yourself if you're using the same decision-making criteria that sent you to prison.
• Aquarius You'll undergo the kind of stress that would break a lesser woman and that will cause whatever kind of woman you are to shatter into a coarse powder.
• Pisces Your dreams will all come true next week, including the ones you have thus far mercifully forgotten upon waking.

Music: Pearl Jam - Alive

Vote!

Well, this is the day guys and gals, time to vote. If you don't you will die. I believe this to be correct because I saw an ad on it for television.

Two very important and factual messages on voting (although a little raunchy - to say the least):

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/104400/vote-or-die

and if you somehow survive this, you most likely will be shunned and even banished:

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/154578/banishment
Music: The Beatles - Taxman

Also thought this was funny:

The Thing

I watched an oldie from the 80's (is that considered an oldie?) called The Thing starring Kurt Russell. Kurt plays a member of a small scientific team working on God knows what in the middle of Antarctica. Their quiet existence is shattered one day as a small band of Norwegians from a nearby camp storm into camp chasing and shooting wildly at a terrified dog. Kurt and his group fend off and kill the Norwegians and protect the mysterious animal. After the dog is locked in a pen with the other dogs, a loud commotion is heard from the pen leading the team to discover to their horror that the dog was in the middle of devouring and physically (and graphically) transforming all the dogs into one normal looking animal. They found it killing and then mimicking the other dogs. After they kill and destroy this monstrosity by fire, dark questions begin to emerge. This "dog" had been in camp for hours and could have conceivably killed and mimicked any member(s?) of the group. No one can be really trusted.

Director John Carpenter creates a pervading sense of tension as well as a general sense of creeping doom throughout each scene. The acting is good enough for a horror movie (not too bad) and the plot works well enough. It isn't for the faint of heart though as a certain number of the scenes contain a fair amount of gore (hardly as bad as those dumb saw and hostel movies though).

Overall a good mystery horror film that will keep you guessing and entertained until the end (and hopefully after as well)

Music: Nine Days - I Love You
I have a strong feeling that this song is a cover, but I could be wrong. Just a good overall song.